Is It Too Soon, Again?
Question by EB in CT: Is it too soon, again?
I met my first husband when I was 19. Married when I was 23. After 8 years of marriage, 12 years together, we separated and eventually divorced 08/2001. I met my second husband really soon. He was only the second man I dated after my first husband. After two years of dating, we married. Four years later, we are separated and I have filed for divorce. Each circumstance of divorce for each marriage was nothing I could control. My first marriage ended due to a very traumatic situation that happened in our family. In my second marriage, my husband turned to drugs and is presently in a drug rehab center.
I am now dating again. It is only the second man I have dated after my second husband. My friends and family are telling me it is too soon. That I am making the same mistake I made after my first marriage. I have not given myself a chance to heal or get to know MYSELF. How do I know when the time is right? I don’t feel I NEED a man in my life to complete me. HELP.
EB in CT
Best answer:
Answer by glaze
yes ur family is right. u dont ned to be hurry to tie a knot again and suffer same consequence jst enjoy dating and give urself a time to heal ask guidance to our dear Lord that he will give u the right husband for u.
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5 Responses to Is It Too Soon, Again?
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i think u should spend some time with yourself only yourself. forget the past and think about future with a healthy mind and soul. after that think about that r u really in a condition that u do not want any man in your life. and the decission that u’ll take will be of best nature…..
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Take some time. Probably a year. You have never established an identity which did not include a man. Any guy who is worth it for the long haul will wait for you to do this.
Going through your submission is enough to understand what you went through. No details of the traumatic situation that ended you first 12 years affair/marriage but drugs caused the second – quite painful. However, you should know that human nature is very complex. You are about 38 or 39 years now and you still don’t understand human nature – its because of the complexity. Too soon or not, the bottomline is that you should be ready that you are not repeating past mistakes.
Your family is right, but then you also need to consider your own happiness, it is very dangerous for you to be lonely now. What you need is to approach God about it. He will direct you aright.
I think your family may be right, you could feel that you r only whole when your married and that’s not very good, but if you think that this time will be different and you feel more strongly about this guy that the other two then get married ,but think before you act…
I really don’t think you’ve healed completely from thr first one yet, let alone the second one. You maried young, and really don’t have a clue who YOU are , or what YOU want. There has always been a man in your life , and you have never had the chance to be YOU. Stay single for awhile, get acquainted with yourself,then move on.