I Need Help With Overcoming a Pornography Addiction.?
Question by zombieeinstein: I need help with overcoming a pornography addiction.?
Ok there’s a whole lot more to my story, but here’s what’s up. I’m trying to overcome a “pornography” addiction. I have a girlfriend whom I plan to marry, but cannot because we are too young still. I love her more than anything, and have told her of my addiction. Slowly I began to stop and got off the “real people” porn. Then I started to get hooked to japanese anime/hentai, and that still is sort of a problem but I feel I can get over it. But now I am looking up stuff on youtube of stupid things like girls sucking on a banana, which I now watch as if it were my old pornography. My girlfriend is completely against pornography, and I feel I am against it too, but I don’t know sometimes. I used to feel really guilty looking up things, but now I don’t.
I really wish I could make love to my girlfriend but I know it’s extremely far away. We do get “intimate” sometimes, but I can’t say I actually enjoy it as much as me “controlling it” online. (It’s not like we can take things that far though.) Please I want to stop for my girlfriend, but I can’t seem to stop for her alone. I feel I want to stop , but I can’t really find a reason why I need to for myself. Please, I don’t want to grow up and be a father of children one day looking up girls sucking on bananas. I feel because it’s on youtube it’s not really bad. Same with anime, I feel because it is a drawing it’s not really as bad. I know it’s bad in a sense, I am a Christian. I don’t really know what to think sometimes. I don’t look at the women in the “porn” with lust, infact, I kind of don’t like seeing the women, I just like the thought of sex, and the extacy of the situation, especially in thought of awaiting the day I will make love to my future wife. (I hope.) I never avoid people, or take time out to look up these things, and I never spend money on them. I do this on my own free private time. I don’t feel it changes my mood either, if anything I feel relieved/relaxed and feel more conversational afterward, (which is good for me because I’m not very outgoing) but I feel guilty knowing that my girlfriend/potential future wife disapproves of it.
Please, if anyone has any wise words of advice please help.
Oh, and I do not feel masturbation is wrong, especially after I decided to quit and months later I started to get health issues. I can’t seem to do it comfortably in the bathroom and be done. It just feels weird to ejaculate to nothing (nothing to watch)/or have no partner.
Please help if you can and thank you.
Edit:
Ok, I didn’t want to put this but I’m 17, she is sixteen. Juniors in high school.
We will not, WILL NOT, engage in pre-marital sex
I will never lie to her or hide anything from her, that’s wrong!
We have talked about this very very seriously. In person, many many hours on the phone. I don’t talk online, I feel that’s for shy people.
I don’t have anyfriends to talk to. And anyone that I can talk to will most likely tell me it’s ok.
I once stopped looking at pornography and masturbating in general for about 4 months straight. The lack of masturbation and wet dreams for that long caused horrific stomach and digestion problems.
She’s always been around I can’t just talk to her and say let’s get freaky. We’re too young. We can’t really get away, we still live with our parents
I can’t really get out a lot, my parents kinda have it down on me, luckily it’s much better than before.
If my parents knew I would die. No help.
I don’t know the root of the problem!
By the way, don’t assume we’ll break up, I know it’s very possible, and she is technically my first girlfriend, but there is a huge story behind our relationship and just pretend marriage is extremely likely.
Best answer:
Answer by BELLA SWAN – edward or jacob??
I FEEL FOR YOU…
Porn is interesting. I am like WOW when i see something like that.
DON’T WORRY
YOU WILL SLOWLY GET BETTER – TRY IF YOU WANT TO STAY WITH YOUR GF!
BEST OF LUCK
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5 Responses to I Need Help With Overcoming a Pornography Addiction.?
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How old are you? Is she your first girlfriend? I highly doubt you guys will get married, unless your like, in college. But scratch that, don’t mind that part.
Hmm so what it seems like so far from the first paragraph is you have some certain fetishes. Thats normal.
Second paragraph, it seems like you have sore sore blue balls. Wait, did you say you jack off to the pornography as you watch it? Whatever, just masturbate more to relieve yourself. Obviously your girl is gone for a long time and you haven’t gotten any action, and watching porn without jacking off is even worse. If you do, then good i guess. It’s normal for every guy to love porn, its actually not normal for a guy to NOT like porn at some age. Your growing up, its hormones n stuff. How old did you say you were? Meh, you didn’t put it in. Just don’t feel freaked out. You can lie to her once and there, or you can just flat out tell her you miss her, and you miss her touch, and you need some. TEll her at least you aren’t; cheating with her. Ask her would she rather have her man’s dick smothered all over another girls vagina, or his own hand, the hand that’ll slap her across the face for saying no. (Ignore that last phrase). But yeah, talk to your girlfriend, tell her its a serious issue, its normal for guys to do this at this age, your horny as hell, yeah. It could just be a phase, and it probably is.
Just talk to her about everything, on the phone, not online, make it serious. Jacking off is normal, just don’t do it too much. Just talk to your girlfriend. She seems to be the only problem. And yeah, of course no one wants thier kids to be watching the stuff you are. Did your parents think the same? Yes, and look at you. no offense or anything, but its normal. Don’t think about the future and consequences TOO much, just leap, and a net will appear.
(if that metaphor made sense)
Easiest way to get over it honesty is to stay away from anything elecronical
stay away from it all for about a month
no talking thinking or anything about it
and if you have the feeling to do it distract yourself as fast as possible
addiction/habits are hard to get over but after a month you wont have any need for it anymore
Every time you masturbate GOD kills a kitten
You said you’re a christian. God can help you with this. Seek help from male christian friends.
My advice to you from person to person is logic based. If you really don’t want to do something – don’t fight yourself and do it. Why cause so much hassle for yourself?
If you don’t want to do it, then don’t do the action of looking at it.
It’s like when I stopped smoking, I didn’t just stop and say ‘I need a cigarette’.
So you don’t just stop looking at porn and say ‘I need to look at porn’.
Another thing is, you have to get to the root of why you feel relief from looking at those things. It’s human nature to have a sex drive but if you want something too much it is considered lust. Maybe you are acting out what society says is taboo, and you get a relief from doing something that you shouldn’t do.
Seek help from a christian male counsellor. They will be able to get to the root of your problem so your actions will change.
Your behaviour is the fruit of a defective root. Uproot it and the fruit will change.
Set your pc settings to childproof:then it is impossible to watch porn any more:it only is a matter of :who is in charge here:porn or you?
Success:Chaos.