Is It Time for in-Patient Center?

Question by Courtney L: Is it time for In-Patient center?
So I’m 20, sophomore in college and since i was about 13 ive been consumed with overwhelming sadness and depression. When I was about 14 I started self-mutalating and after a year I started doing it everyday. When I was 17 i turned to drug use (marijuana, LSD, shrooms, skittles (coricidin cough medicine) and coke a few times. Ive exchanged the cutting for cigarettes, and now I’m a daily marijuana smoker and when its to the point where If i dont use everyday, I will get so upset and cry and its just…not good.

anyway, its been almost impossible to study in school, have decent relationships with men, my family and my friends and I have this feeling like I’m always a burden on people and I often find myself having severe and continuous thoughts of suicide even when something so insignificant happens like for instance:

If a friend and I have a tiny tiff when hanging out, I immediatly think of suicide… I can’t control it. the best way I can describe it is a flood. Its like a giant wave of these morbid and dark thoughts just flood my head and I can’t become happy again and its hard for me to get over things.

What I’m getting at is that I dont. want. to be. here. anymore. I need to get away…out of this town and away from everything… I need to get this under control and learn how to function as a normal human being in society and I dont want to feel this way anymore.

Now, I’m from Ohio. So is there maybe an inpatient treatment center I could stay at…you know, like rehab only for depression?

and if so, how do you pay for it?

and lastley, my parents have NO CLUE… how do i break the news that I want to leave school and attend said place?

thanks so much for your answers…

Best answer:

Answer by Jake Tapper
I know what your saying, i’ve had alot of struggles since I was like 10, maybe even before. I’ve had conentration problems, usually I just feel blank, i zone out alot, my communication problems suck, I wake up tired after 8 hour sleep, people usually see me as dumb. My boss just made a joke about me being bad luck on friday and its been on my mind all weekend cause i’m not sure he was all the way kidding (or every joke has just a little bit of truth in it) but like to me, death is like the least stressful thing on my mind during the day. I went to psych hospital for a week and basically it wasn’t the “getaway” that you might think. It kinda felt like any average day for me (like I usually feel trapped and without freedom and it didn’t really make my problems seem any easier also). Going there doesn’t make the world become clearer. Usually when you go they just keep you controlled enough until they get u into outpatient services. Maybe just skip the middle man and try therapy first

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